Comments on: Improving Self-Esteem http://lifeafterdivorce.wordpress.com/2008/06/02/improving-self-esteem/ Don't just GO through it, GROW through it Thu, 29 Oct 2009 07:03:42 +0000 http://wordpress.com/ hourly 1 By: chandij http://lifeafterdivorce.wordpress.com/2008/06/02/improving-self-esteem/#comment-58 chandij Sat, 28 Jun 2008 19:10:50 +0000 http://lifeafterdivorce.wordpress.com/?p=46#comment-58 Thanks Annie, I am trying to have a positive attitude toward this tough time I'm in... Some days I achieve it. Other days, like today, I feel low. I saw my husband yesterday and we got along fine and I felt relatively strong. Today I had thoughts about things that were painful in the marriage and when I saw him today, I saw him as the source of my pain and I couldn't be around him. I am trying now to pull myself out of the emotional slump I've fallen into today. http://italiandreams.wordpress.com/ Thanks Annie,
I am trying to have a positive attitude toward this tough time I’m in… Some days I achieve it. Other days, like today, I feel low. I saw my husband yesterday and we got along fine and I felt relatively strong. Today I had thoughts about things that were painful in the marriage and when I saw him today, I saw him as the source of my pain and I couldn’t be around him. I am trying now to pull myself out of the emotional slump I’ve fallen into today.

http://italiandreams.wordpress.com/

]]> By: Annie O\'Neill http://lifeafterdivorce.wordpress.com/2008/06/02/improving-self-esteem/#comment-56 Annie O\'Neill Thu, 26 Jun 2008 19:31:31 +0000 http://lifeafterdivorce.wordpress.com/?p=46#comment-56 Hi Chandij I think you are right - we are constantly changing and growing and we won't always be lucky enough to grow together with our partner. Everyone gains something from a marriage, even if it is only the experience that it was wrong for you at that time and/or with that person. As long as we learn from our mistakes it was not a failure. You're right - it is courageous to face the unknown and know that you'll be OK on your own. Good luck with your Italian adventure. It sounds like you will be just fine with your wonderful attitude to life. Annie Hi Chandij

I think you are right – we are constantly changing and growing and we won’t always be lucky enough to grow together with our partner. Everyone gains something from a marriage, even if it is only the experience that it was wrong for you at that time and/or with that person. As long as we learn from our mistakes it was not a failure.

You’re right – it is courageous to face the unknown and know that you’ll be OK on your own.

Good luck with your Italian adventure. It sounds like you will be just fine with your wonderful attitude to life.

Annie

]]> By: chandij http://lifeafterdivorce.wordpress.com/2008/06/02/improving-self-esteem/#comment-55 chandij Thu, 26 Jun 2008 05:38:30 +0000 http://lifeafterdivorce.wordpress.com/?p=46#comment-55 Regarding positive or negative thinking: Thoughts are very powerful, I agree! I think one problem with divorce is that our society tends to see it as a "failure" and so we feel we're failing if we're getting divorced. Some people are able to stay together for ever, for some it really works. But how realistic is it really, to stay with the same person if we're always growing and changing? It's wonderful when it works to grow together, but it's certainly not always going to be what happens. Perhaps we need to see the period of time that we were married, as part of our growth process, and see the divorce as part of the growth process too, in a positive way. And have the outlook that it's OK to move on from being with that one person. It's not a failure. It's in fact being courageous to be willing to really face that it's not in our best interest to stay with that person. It's courageous to face the unknown and to know that you'll be OK on your own. http://italiandreams.wordpress.com/ Regarding positive or negative thinking: Thoughts are very powerful, I agree! I think one problem with divorce is that our society tends to see it as a “failure” and so we feel we’re failing if we’re getting divorced. Some people are able to stay together for ever, for some it really works. But how realistic is it really, to stay with the same person if we’re always growing and changing? It’s wonderful when it works to grow together, but it’s certainly not always going to be what happens. Perhaps we need to see the period of time that we were married, as part of our growth process, and see the divorce as part of the growth process too, in a positive way. And have the outlook that it’s OK to move on from being with that one person. It’s not a failure. It’s in fact being courageous to be willing to really face that it’s not in our best interest to stay with that person. It’s courageous to face the unknown and to know that you’ll be OK on your own.
http://italiandreams.wordpress.com/

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